Praying is Conversation
No one learns to speak without others.
Praying is conversation. The first meaning of the word "pray"
in English is not worship. It simply means to address earnestly. But
most especially to earnestly address God.
Someone must teach us to pray in at
least a rudimentary way. When we address or ask someone, we hope for
a response. We are engaging in conversation. We pray to others in the
old English phrase "pray, tell". We pray to or address
earnestly the saints and angels. To the holy souls in Purgatory.
Even, as is tradition from the ancient Church, to those we have loved
in life and are confident they will hear and respond. All as members
of the Body of Christ- remembering Jesus' answer to the Sadducees
about the resurrection - He is the God of the living, not of the dead
(Mark 12:24-27).
Prayer is sacred conversation. What is
important in good conversation? Listening attentively and speaking
sincerely. Good conversation has more listening than speaking since
God has given us two ears and only one mouth. Remember the gospel
story of Mary and Martha (Luke 10:38-42). Putting all else aside,
Mary listens to Jesus. Our Lord says this is the best "portion".
Does God listen to us? Does our Blessed Mother Mary listen to us? The
saints and angels? When as babbling children we run to them, they
listen. Even the souls in Purgatory, are they not learning to listen
better? Think of someone who stops what they are doing and listens
intently to a child.
We are lifted up in prayer. God begins
our desire to pray and sustains us in prayer. And as a child lifts
his hands to be picked up, when we lift our hands in prayer we are
lifted up. We may realize that actually God has lifted our hands and
picked us up. Our cooperation with grace in prayer is to hold on.
When we are lifted up, God speaks to us. Have you never heard God
speak to you? Did you compose the Our Father and the Hail Mary? The
Bible? Does not the Holy Spirit give us the original urge to pray?
And as we pray, poorly, tearfully, in anger and sorrow and joy, does
not God deign to sustain us in existence? Even when we just cry "God
help me", it is God who originates this movement in our minds.
Prayer Life
Praying and a prayer life are distinct.
As one healthful meal is distinct from following a healthful diet.
Thank God, all of us sinners can go to our Father and pray for
ourselves and others. We can address the angels, saints and holy
souls in Purgatory with faith. However a "life" denotes a
continuous living growth. To have the continuous growth in a prayer
life in response to grace requires the same kind of self-discipline
that any aspect of life needs - physical, social, intellectual, work,
and family life. They must be part of our lives in an orderly,
regular and consistent manner.
Often we do not do the most obvious and
simple things that are good for us because they are so obvious and
simple. Or we can have another good reason: what is obvious to
another is not to us. Developing a disciplined habit of praying can
be one of those things. First, we must make a place for prayer in our
daily routine. Do we not ask our Father to give us our daily bread?
Religious orders who should seek perfection have a Rule. We can
voluntarily make our own rule and adjust it to ourselves and adjust
our lives to it. Begin by writing down an outline of the most basic,
regular and customary things you do each day of the week. Start with
Sunday and note the broad schedule of what you do. After you make
yourself write down what may seem unnecessary and unimportant, you
will receive wonderful benefits. You will have greater focus and
control of your life. You will be empowered to achieve much more in
your living. Do you have time each morning to greet God? To make a
morning offering before you leave the side of your bed? Do you have
time at midday to close your eyes and pray a Hail Mary? Do you have
time after dinner or at the end of your work day to pray? Are there
one or two days a week you can schedule fifteen minutes of spiritual
reading? You have scheduled Sunday Eucharist? You do go to Confession
on a regular basis? Take the empowering step of actually writing this
down. Again, you are the author of your Rule of Life and can make
future changes carefully. But write it down.
What is on your Rule of work, duties,
prayer and rest? May I suggest that the place of honor for devotional
prayer go to the Rosary? There are those who think people can outgrow
the Rosary. The Rosary is our meditation with our Blessed Mother Mary
on the life, passion, death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. Exactly
how does a Christian stop pondering these things in their heart with
Mary? Read the Forty-Eighth Rose in St. Louis De Montfort's book The
Secret of the Rosary. He warns us against many subtle ways some may
persuade us to lessen our Rosary devotion. Providentially it is a
help toward keeping not just the Rosary but all our devotional life.
One of the fruits that some great
saints experience in prayer is rapture -an interior transport or
going out of themselves to be close to our Lord in Heaven. We can all
have a slight taste of this in a consoling feeling God may
occasionally grant us. Yet, who is in Heaven with God? Our Blessed
Mother Mary, the angels and the saints. Simply sitting somewhere
quietly and praying to Mary and some of our favorite angels and
saints gradually can leave us with a sense that we have been in their
heavenly presence.
The Cross
A life of prayer will weaken without
embracing the Cross. The self-discipline already described can give
our prayer life a strong start but it can only bring us so far. To
develop an everlasting life of prayer requires more. Now let me
remind us of truths that I have always neglected. At best I have
given them a complacent nod or, most often, let them in one ear and
out the other. "He who has ears to hear, let him hear."
(Mark 4 :9)
Jesus said "If anyone wishes to
come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and
follow me". (Mark 8:34) We must remember penance for our sins
and mortification to avoid sin. Self-discipline and even self-denial,
yes. But what happens with a cross? You are crucified. We will be
tempted to throw down the cross and flee when faced with crucifixion
- if in our heart we have not embraced suffering for Christ.
Suffering for Christ? Is it not Christ
who suffered to redeem us? Why embrace suffering? St Paul says in
Philippians 1 :29: "For you have been given the favor on
Christ's behalf- not only to believe in him but also to suffer for
him". Later in chapter 3 St. Paul repeats these sentiments in
speaking about the "power of his resurrection and the fellowship
of his sufferings". He goes on to warn against those who are the
enemies of the cross. Yes, we must not only humbly accept the
suffering that comes into every life, we should actively seek the
Cross in acts of self-sacrifice especially acts of charity.
Embracing the Cross is why the Divine
Liturgy or the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass is the true source and
summit of prayer. This is Jesus Christ lifting us up in His holy
Life, Passion, Death, Resurrection, Ascension and His Second Glorious
Coming in Holy Communion.
Fall and Get Up
There are difficulties in praying. Our
infirm hearts and minds want to do something else. We find our own
prayers to be dry and mechanical. We are distracted by stress,
worries or the attractions of this stage of life. St. Teresa of Avila
in her life story sees our souls as having three active functions -
willing, understanding and imagining. She says that while
"understanding" and "imagination" are good, they
must be under the will. We should focus on our intention to pray, our
wanting to pray and to gently push aside attempts by our imagination
or understanding to take over. I was startled recently to see a quote
in my Sunday church bulletin that expresses it well. St. Evagrius of
Pontus wrote: "Prayer means rejecting pleasures and banishing
anger ... During your prayer, try to keep your mind deaf and dumb.
Only so will you be able to pray."
Finally,
persevering in prayer means everything. St. Teresa says " ...
what great blessings God grants to a soul when He prepares it to love
the practice of prayer, though it may not be as well prepared already
as it should be; and how, if that soul perseveres, notwithstanding
the sins, temptations and falls of a thousand kinds into which the
devil leads it, the Lord, I am certain, will bring it to the harbour
of salvation, just as, so far as can at present be told, He has
brought me. May His Majesty grant that I may never again be lost."
(The Life of Teresa of Jesus, p. 110; Trans. By E. Allison Peers)